‘No Context Idiots’: 30 Times People Were So Unbelievably Silly
UNNY, MEMES20 HOURS AGO

30個(gè)令人不禁驚呼“天才”的大無(wú)語(yǔ)事件



作者 Gabriel? Malukait? 和 Aust?ja Akavickait?

We humans are wonderful creatures. We have been gifted with a unique intellectual power, capable of forming deep thoughts and creating complex works. But sometimes, just sometimes, our mind wants to take a break and our actions can seem absurd and, well, just plain stupid.

人是個(gè)奇妙的生物。我們被賦予了獨特的思維能力,可以產(chǎn)生深刻的思想,創(chuàng )造復雜的作品。但有時(shí)候,我們大腦需要小憩一下,只是有時(shí)候,我們的行為看起來(lái)很荒謬,甚至很愚蠢。

Let us introduce you to a Twitter page called “No context idiots”, a place proving that no one is completely immune to foolishness. With over 1.3 million followers, it is a treasure trove for all things irrational and absurd. From unbridled internet jokes to images that leave us wondering what exactly these people were thinking, this page presents us with an unexpected variety of ideas and actions.

請允許我向各位介紹推特上一個(gè)名為“無(wú)厘頭(No context idiots 毫無(wú)緣由的白癡行為)”搞笑主題頻道,里面的內容似乎證明了人無(wú)法擺脫愚蠢。該頻道擁有130多萬(wàn)粉絲,是所有搞怪耍寶和荒謬事件的集合體。從天馬行空的網(wǎng)絡(luò )笑話(huà)到讓我們大無(wú)語(yǔ)的圖片,它向我們展示了各式各樣令人意想不到的奇葩思想和行為。
#1 (教訓孩子的方式)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:我教訓孩子的方式是,我不會(huì )去拿走手機,而是他手機充電器,然后靜靜欣賞孩子在面對手機電池逐漸耗盡時(shí)所流露出的恐懼表情)

QuirkyKittyGirl
R E S P E C T .

厲害

Rainbow person (He/Him)
You are an evil mastermind

你好邪惡啊

DaisyGirl
Pure Genius

(樓主)絕對是天才
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Mario Strada
As if they are not smart enough to have a spare cord. Many outlets have USB built in as well.

孩子腦袋不靈光,充電的方法有很多,好多插排上面都有USB電源接口的

2late4me
If you take away everything, they have nothing to lose.

如果你拿走了一切,那他們就沒(méi)什么可失去的了。
#2 (好有道理)
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(解決饑餓的方法,圖示一:第一步 圖示二:若你還是感覺(jué)餓的話(huà),請進(jìn)行第二步。問(wèn)題解決)

LuLikesReptiles
true

真的是這樣呢?。?!

Sami-Jo Ross
Someone with common sense...

好有常識的人

JL
They're just warning you that if you pour the milk too vigorously, your Cheerios will launch out of the bowl.

他們只是想提醒你,如果你牛奶倒得太多,麥圈會(huì )從碗里溢出來(lái)的。

Menacing Duck
actually-646e48367a549.jpg
JD Cass
Then add more milk, because it's too dry. Repeat steps 1-4 and behold: The Never-ending Bowl of Cereal

如果感覺(jué)太稠,就再加點(diǎn)牛奶。重復1到4次,這時(shí)你就會(huì )發(fā)現,你就有了吃不完的麥片粥

Luke Branwen
I hope all you cereal-first bozos enjoy your soggy piles of sadness xD

我希望你們這幫先吃麥片的傻瓜好好享受你們的“幸?!睙?

Blue_Mouse (queen)
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

你是不是有???

Grace <3
I always pour my cereal first, then the milk. if I have extra milk, instead of pouring it down the drain, I pour a little bit more cereal until the milk is gone. is this just me?

我一般是先放倒麥片,再倒牛奶。如果還剩不少奶,我不會(huì )倒掉,而是再放一點(diǎn)麥片,直至用完奶。不會(huì )只有我這么做吧?
#3 (這是我老爹這個(gè)禮拜所遭遇到的第二次汽車(chē)肇事事故)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Abel
Is dad inside the coffin?

那個(gè)木匣子里裝的不會(huì )是你爸吧?

Terran
I don't know, at this point it is just an overkill.

無(wú)話(huà)可說(shuō),這簡(jiǎn)直死的不能再透了
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


freakingbee is going offline
i'm going to hell for laughing at this

我可能要因為笑話(huà)它而下地獄

——————
‘No Context Idiots” joined Twitter in 2020. It didn’t take too long for them to reach an impressive number of followers and become one of the most popular pages that brings laughter and giggles to everyone that stops by. We sincerely hope these images will lift your spirits too!

“無(wú)厘頭”于2020年入駐推特。沒(méi)過(guò)多久,該頻道訂閱粉絲暴增,并成為最受歡迎的頻道之一,它能給每一個(gè)來(lái)到這里的人帶來(lái)歡樂(lè )。我們真心希望這些圖片能讓你能感到更加愉快
#4 (鎖屏畫(huà)面,密碼輸入成功前和成功后)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Mangelo Il Fumatori
This one is genius.

這人就是天才

Burnt Bagel
This is actually really cool!

確實(shí)挺酷的

Nichole Harris
OMG I'm stealing this

好家伙,我也想整一個(gè)

sally
Kuddos for having a smart phone that lasts you nine years!!

能擁有一個(gè)可以使用9年的智能手機簡(jiǎn)直是太棒了
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


lonely miso
why is it 1:11 AM?

為什么是凌晨1點(diǎn)11分?

Verena Fiori-Jambor
Funny!

有意思
#5 (腿…)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(注:下圖完整名為lego,樂(lè )高)

Christian Golden
The man spends all day stepping on LEGO. He is in my prayers.

這個(gè)人整天都在踩樂(lè )高積木。為他祈福。

Sarcastic and Proud
Actually, people have made real prosthetic limbs out of Legos. It's totally cool

事實(shí)上,人們已能用樂(lè )高積木做出真正的假肢。這也泰褲辣。

DarkViolet
Really? Where can I find photos of this?

真的假的?你這圖是從哪里找來(lái)的?

Kimbowa
I hope now and in the future that whatever parts people need or want to replace are replaced with colorful fun joyful choices.

我希望無(wú)論是現在和將來(lái),無(wú)論人們想要換什么東西,都能被豐富多彩的、有趣的、令人愉悅的選擇所替代。

Nina Ross
What happens if he steps on lego?

要是他不小心踩到別的樂(lè )高積木可咋辦?

QuirkyKittyGirl
He picks it up and it becomes part of his leg

那就順其自然,讓它自動(dòng)成為腿的一部分。

unseeable mouse
Well this is actually pretty cool i've seen ppl customize their legs and stuff I actually have a relative with a missing leg. I just don't know if that's stable enough......

嗯,確實(shí)很酷,我見(jiàn)過(guò)人們定制做過(guò)個(gè)性假肢,實(shí)際上我有一個(gè)親戚失去了一條腿。我只是懷疑這東西能結實(shí)嗎?

Valek Fermiga
He made his choice, just lego of it....

他已經(jīng)做出了選擇,只不過(guò)選擇的是樂(lè )高....

#6
Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Joseph Gelfo
He is unstoppable

他好勇哦

bears. beets. battlestar galactica.
well done!!!!

干得不錯

P.C.
That’s gonna get messy. How would one do that simultaneously?

這么多事他是怎么同時(shí)做到呢?
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Burnt Bagel
My type of hero

這就是我心目中的大英雄

Sara W
Why am I laughing soo hard at him holding 2 beverages!!!?

為什么看他拿著(zhù)兩個(gè)飲料杯子我就想笑

Sans Serif
Accurately matching the signs...

完美符合

Kevin carton
Probably a law student

可能是律師學(xué)生

Johnnynatfan (edited)
Haha this guy is “Hey Jack, you can’t tell me what to do!”

哈哈,這人好像在說(shuō):“嘿,杰克,你沒(méi)權利告訴我應該怎么做!”

——————
Human behavior and decisions are often complex and depend on a variety of factors. Who knows why we sometimes get involved in questionable situations and do things we feel embarrassed about later on?

人類(lèi)的行為和決策成因往往很復雜,這取決于各種各樣的因素。誰(shuí)都不知道自己將會(huì )面對什么未知問(wèn)題,做一些讓我們以后感到尷尬的事情?

However, we believe that we've all had those moments where we begin to analyze our past irrational actions and wonder ‘what was I thinking?’ In moments like these, it may be better to think of any wrong decisions we have made in the past as important components contributing to our maturity. Since there’s nothing we can do to change our past actions, it’s better to learn from them to improve our present.

無(wú)論怎樣,誰(shuí)都遇過(guò)這種尷尬時(shí)刻,但隨后開(kāi)始分析我們之前的非理性行為,并想知道“我當時(shí)為什么會(huì )這樣想?” 此時(shí),最好把我們犯的錯誤決策看作是促成我們成熟的重要因素。既然我們無(wú)法改變過(guò)去的行為,那就從中吸取教訓,以避免未來(lái)類(lèi)似問(wèn)題再次出現。
#7 (愛(ài)的結晶...?)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Terran
Well if the young one is grown up and has sex with a centaur, there is chance they give birth to a totally normal guy or a totally normal horse. I imagine in both cases their child will be called Steve.

如果這只小馬長(cháng)大了和半人馬啪啪后,他們就有可能生下一個(gè)完全正常的人或一匹完全正常的馬。我想在這兩種情況下,都應把他們的孩子叫做史蒂夫。

Spocks's Mom
I was hoping for Tony, but I can live with Steve.

但我更希望叫托尼,這樣我就可以和史蒂夫呆在一起了。

Robert T
Who's the daddy? Oh!

好家伙,他爹到底是誰(shuí)?

Lia is a platypus
I have now been traumatized

此時(shí)的我,精神受到極大暴擊
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Cardboard Box (He/She)
WHOA WHAT THE FùCK

這是什么鬼
#8 (請不要對羊使用意大利式肢體語(yǔ)言)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
unseeable mouse
Wow u know Italian so well

哇哦,你挺懂意大利語(yǔ)啊
#9 (解脫)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Id row
As long as birth control is being used, I don't care what's on the cover.

只要能打掉孩子,封皮上畫(huà)的啥我無(wú)所謂。

m?? ? (/)
*yeets baby* Mission completed

好的寶貝,任務(wù)完成

glowworm2
I don't know why the baby's so happy about it though.

我就納悶封皮上畫(huà)的那個(gè)寶寶為啥會(huì )這么開(kāi)心。

Brainmas
This picture really belongs more on Plan B than on birth control, but I like it anyway.

這圖片更適合B計劃而不是避孕,但我還是比較喜歡。

Sumdumfu
Yo she got a nice jump shot tho

她跳投的水平不錯啊

Amadiro
I think this is wrong. These pills are to prevent conception . This is how People get misi

我認為這個(gè)圖在釋放錯誤信息。這藥是用來(lái)避孕的。人們看它很容易理解錯誤引起歧義

————
In case you were wondering, there are ways to better manage our irrational tendencies. To act in a way that won’t leave you embarrassed in the future, it is important to know how to control strong emotions. That can reduce impulsive actions and make you reflect on your behavior before making any decisions.

你要知道,有一些方法可以將我們的非理性趨向控制在可接受的范圍內。為避免自己當前的行不會(huì )讓未來(lái)的自己感到尷尬,因此情緒控制非常重要。如情緒控制得當,不僅會(huì )減少沖動(dòng)行為,還會(huì )讓你在做任何決定之前三思而后行。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Awareness and self-reflection are necessary qualities to better understand yourself and your motivations. Critical thinking and the ability to reflect on one's actions can help discover the reasons why the irrational behavior occurred. By understanding these reasons, it is possible to look for alternative ways of acting in the future.

領(lǐng)悟能力和自我反省是了解自己和行為動(dòng)機的必要素質(zhì)。批判性思維和自我反省能力有助于發(fā)現沖動(dòng)的起因。分析這些原因,就有可能幫助未來(lái)的你更好地解決問(wèn)題。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Let’s not forget that by discussing our decisions with loved ones or relying on trusted advice, we can gain new perspectives and insights. Also, by interacting with others, we can learn from their experiences and receive support to improve and manage our irrational and sometimes foolish tendencies.

我們不要忘了,在下某個(gè)決定前,要先與自己親近的人進(jìn)行討論,虛心接受忠實(shí)建議,這會(huì )讓我們得到新的視角和見(jiàn)解。此外,通過(guò)與他人的交流,我們可以從中汲取對方的經(jīng)驗教訓,得到對方的建議,以改善和控制我們的非理性,有時(shí)甚至是愚蠢的傾向。
#10 (最佳拍檔)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖左:非保安(亦可理解,非安全因素,搗亂分子),圖右:保安)


Sean
i want this

我也想來(lái)一件

Louie
Already have it. Don’t recommend it

已經(jīng)有了。但不推薦

Id row
They cancel each other out.

他倆可以相互抵消了

Joseph Gelfo
Security and Insecurity: The Brother Guards.

安全與不安全: 弟兄衛隊。
#11 (你的密碼已經(jīng)被starboy98用戶(hù)給占用了)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Hawkmoon
Try it on starboy98 account.

試著(zhù)進(jìn)一下 starboy98 賬戶(hù)

Walter Brameld
Congratulations, that's literally the joke.

恭喜,這絕對是個(gè)笑話(huà)。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Kira Okah (edited)
It's an older meme but it checks out. It's not real, but I am sure that you know that already, from a programmer humour photoshop series.

老圖了,早就被辟謠了。這是假的,但我相信你也應該能看得出來(lái),這圖是一個(gè)碼農惡搞的。

Joseph Gelfo
Sometime later, starboy98: I just got hacked, wtf?!

過(guò)了一段時(shí)間,starboy98:我好像剛被黑了,王德發(fā)??!
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


astral slug (he/she/they)
starboy98 rn:
awkmonk-646e886f10014-png.jpg

(此時(shí) starboy98 的內心)
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


leunaichs 123
ok so what website is this please

好的,網(wǎng)站地址說(shuō)一下。

#12
Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Sheena
The fear in her eyes lmao

看它驚恐的目光,哈哈哈

QuirkyKittyGirl
So THAT's what happened to the sphinx! (Not really.)

獅身人面像就是這么來(lái)的!(假的)

What-Happened-to-the-Sphinxs-Nose-Trips-in-Egypt-1.jpg
My “in my head” Voice
This is awesome!

這也太可怕了

glowworm2
Careful, she might call the cops!

小心,她可能會(huì )報警的!

Grace <3
aww, they took her nose

好家伙,雕像鼻子被打掉了

BeepBoop is Lonely (she/they)
once I did this to a baby and they cried

有次我對一個(gè)還在襁褓中的小孩也這么做過(guò),他哭了

——————
As we can see from the images, we humans are not always rational decision-making beings. Reckless instincts, emotions, or even unconscious processes are often at work. Some psychologists believe that our choices can be automated, based on learned patterns of behavior. So, sometimes we act in almost mechanical ways, even if we appear absurd or plain silly.

從這些圖片得知,我們人類(lèi)是偶爾會(huì )犯蠢的生物。本能的魯莽,情緒,甚至是無(wú)厘頭意識在影響著(zhù)你。一些心理學(xué)家認為,基于習得的行為模式,我們會(huì )下意識的去完成工作。所以,有時(shí),我們的行為幾乎是機械式的,即使我們所做的一切看起來(lái)異?;闹嚮蛴薮?。
#13 (沒(méi)毛?。?br>原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:這個(gè)拼圖也不難嘛)

cats_from_the_void
you totally slayed it

天才啊,你真是太厲害了

Did I say that out loud?
I think there's a piece missing.

我怎么感覺(jué)哪里像是少了一塊呢

Nice Beast Ludo
Yup middle right leg

確實(shí),中間的那個(gè)右腿

Load More Replies...
m?? ? (/)
Work smarter not harder

更聰明地工作,而不是更努力地工作
#14 (還好沒(méi)得新冠(其他的病都得全了))

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(有那么一瞬間我還以為我感染上了新冠,還好不是?。?

Joseph Gelfo
They took stay positive to a whole nother level.

他們把“樂(lè )觀(guān)向上”提升到了一個(gè)全新的高度。

Bobby G
Always look on the bright side of life ig

生活中總要向往陽(yáng)光的一面嘛,不是嗎?
#15 (蒙娜麗傻?)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Katie Lutesinger
Uh-oh, she's escaped again.

好家伙,這妹子難到是從畫(huà)里逃出來(lái)了吧
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Cosmologist wannabe
WAIT! NO! THAT ISN"T HER! SHE GOT EYEBROWS!

等下,這不是她,蒙娜麗莎是沒(méi)有眉毛的

Kerry Miller
She's on the run. Someone tried to frx her.

這是在逃亡。是有人想害她吧。

Alexandru Bucur
This was an ad for the RATP (Régie Autonome des Transports Parisiens), the Paris public transport operator.

這是巴黎公交公司RATP的一則廣告。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


KDS
Don’t museum pieces usually come alive at night?

博物館的展品通常不是在晚上才有活動(dòng)么?(暗指《博物館奇妙夜》)

Dash Junior
“May I take a selfie with you, please? “Oui. Ten franks.”

“我可以和你拍個(gè)照嗎?”“可以。十弗蘭克斯?!?

Cyber Returns
Not happy because the bus is late

瞧她不高興的樣子,肯定是因為公交車(chē)晚點(diǎn)了
#16 (數學(xué)天才)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:我女票試了3次驗孕棒, 結果3次都是陽(yáng)性…,我們可能要有三孩了(大哭))
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Olivia Lisbon
Keep testing, you may still have more.

你要是再測下去,會(huì )更多的…
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m?? ? (/)
omg I gonna have 639268261973 babies/s

完了,我可能快有N個(gè)寶寶了

Pizza Lover
That's not how it works. It means your kid is pregnant with another kid who is pregnant with a third kid

你錯了,事情應該是這樣。你的孩子懷上了另一個(gè)孩子,而這個(gè)孩子肚子里又有了一個(gè)

Joseph Gelfo (edited)
Prolly gonna suck, she's gonna be pregnant for 27 months! /j

太糟了,你女票可能要有27個(gè)月的孕期了!
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Hadron Enforcer
The dumbest child ever is going to be a father…

史上最蠢的孩子就要當爸了……

QuirkyKittyGirl
There was a girl at my high school who got pregnant, but didn't tell her parents. She was a tad bit on the heavy side, so she was able to hide it. She and her boyfriend were both whom were startled to find that you CAN, in fact, get pregnant the FIRST TIME These marshmallow heads also believed that babies "only come at night," so she could have the baby and go back to school the next day. What a world of education she received when she gave birth in a high school ladies room … at 4:00 in the afternoon. (The poor girl had panicked when she didn't think the baby was breathing, and she stuffed it in the garbage can. Luckily, a teacher came in just then, and all worked out for the best. Both sets of parents were supportive

高中時(shí)我們學(xué)校有個(gè)女孩懷孕了,但她爸媽不知道。幸好她有點(diǎn)胖,肚子不明顯,外人看不出來(lái)。這事都給她和她男友嚇壞了,因為第一次遇到這種事??伤麄円詾樵谕砩贤低蛋押⒆由鰜?lái),第二天就可以照常上學(xué)??傻较挛?點(diǎn),她把孩子生在了學(xué)校廁所里,當發(fā)現生下的孩子沒(méi)有呼吸時(shí),給他們嚇得趕緊把嬰兒扔進(jìn)垃圾箱里,還好,這時(shí)一位路過(guò)的老師及時(shí)發(fā)現,一切才好起來(lái),雙方父母也沒(méi)反對。

Sue Denham
If only you'd worn three condoms, eh?

要是你帶三個(gè)套套就沒(méi)這事了

#17
Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:我和我老師都忘了那天放假,所以只有我倆在那里)

PeeledPotato
my worst nightmare

這場(chǎng)景簡(jiǎn)直就是我最可怕的噩夢(mèng)

Forgot My Name...
Why did you both stay?

那你倆還呆在那干嘛?

René Sauer
I really hope they just staged the pic as a joke. I would rather go home than stay and do school work

真希望他們只是擺拍著(zhù)玩,要是我我寧可回家也不想在那里做作業(yè)

tuzdayschild
Where I live, they lock up the school on holidays.

我那里要是放假,學(xué)校會(huì )鎖門(mén)的

Embla Jóhannesdóttir
that has happened to me so many times oml

這種事在我身上已經(jīng)發(fā)生過(guò)很多次了

Mr.Li
Happened once to me too. We played Dungeons & Dragons =)

我也遇到過(guò)一次。只不過(guò)我們玩起了《龍與地下城》游戲

View more comments

#18 (尋貓啟事)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(這不就是它…)

Did I say that out loud?
If anyone asks, you didn't see anything, ok?

貓貓:如果有人問(wèn)起,你就說(shuō)什么都沒(méi)看見(jiàn),好嗎?
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Violet1854
Don't you dare see me, ya idiot!

你竟敢打我主意?白癡!

Alan Green
Looks like he didn't want to be seen

看來(lái)它不想被人找到

Blma1025 1 hour ago
You: Found Tinks Tinks: Don't even think about it, I will cut you!

你:這不就是那只貓么
貓貓:想都別想,否則干掉你!
#19 (她搞了輛跟表情包里一模一樣的小汽車(chē))
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Daria
it's so cute I wanna squeeze it

好可愛(ài),我好想捏一捏

Kel_how
What size tires are those even??

車(chē)的輪胎尺寸能有多大?

Majungasaurus
Does anyone know what kind of car?

有人知道這是啥車(chē)嗎?

Spocks's Mom (edited)
Senza Patente Minicar is what I am finding with a very quick and extremely unthorough search. I doubt they are street legal in some countries or they could only be driven under strict conditions. I wouldn't expect to see them on the US interstates.

網(wǎng)上說(shuō)是Senza Patente牌迷你汽車(chē)。但我懷疑這車(chē)在有些國家能否上路,或者它們只能在特定的條件下上路??晌也幌M诿绹闹蓦H公路上看到它們。

Rosie Red
It's smaller than my SmartCar.

這車(chē)比我家那臺SmartCar還小啊
#20 (車(chē)鑰匙被熊孩子藏沙子里了,全家都已經(jīng)已經(jīng)找一個(gè)小時(shí)了)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots
Just a boring person (edited)
Guess the kids would need to wait until they're 20 to be given a car!

我覺(jué)得孩子們要到20歲才能有輛車(chē)!

JL
Doesn't every beach have that eccentric old guy with the metal detector? Call him over.

不是每個(gè)海灘都有個(gè)拿著(zhù)金屬探測器的怪老頭嗎?請他過(guò)來(lái)啊。

Fat Harry
My brother did this when we were on holiday in France. We did find them, though.

我們家去法國度假玩時(shí),我哥就這么干過(guò)。還好,最后還是找到了。

the redqueen 1 hour ago
Hahaha, how long did it take to find them, and did your brother " get it" for burying the keys?

哈哈,你花了多長(cháng)時(shí)間才找到鑰匙,你哥也把鑰匙藏沙子里了么?

Red Wyvern Emperor 1 hour ago
At this point only miracle or metal detector would help.

碰上這事,除非運氣否則只有金屬探測儀能幫上忙了

Sara W
I did't read keys at first and I was amazed that 2 kids buried a car.

剛開(kāi)始看標題沒(méi)注意里面的Key這個(gè)詞,我還以為是車(chē)被那倆熊孩子給埋沙子里了。
#21(綠帽)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(我剛在我女友的手機通話(huà)記錄里發(fā)現了這個(gè),這是哪家客服,也太貼心了把)

Did I say that out loud?
Do we tell him?

我們要告訴他么?

THE DERP
he will know soon enough

不用,他很快就會(huì )知道的

Sergio Bicerra
Nothing compared to the nightly "I Love U Babe" Pizza Hut sends my GF.

沒(méi)有什么能比得上必勝客服,他們每晚總都給我女票發(fā)“愛(ài)你寶貝”的短消息。

Jared Robinson
I'm not telling him YOU tell him

我是不會(huì )說(shuō)的,還是你告訴他吧

MonicaChicagoGal
Come here I have something to tell you..

過(guò)來(lái),我有事要告訴你。

Cooking Panda
Does she have messages from Burger King & Pizza Hut too?

她有在漢堡王和必勝客的留過(guò)言嗎?
#22 (迷路的公交車(chē))

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:是的,我是真TM的迷路了)

cats_from_the_void
so am i, mr bus, so am i

彼此彼此,巴斯先生,我也是

Jeremy James
Late one night, I was waiting for my bus after work, and another city bus rolled by with all of the interior lights off. I could see the silhouettes of the people sitting inside, and the destination on the front said, "Nowhere." To this day, I have no idea what that was.

有天晚上,下班后我在等公交車(chē),其中有輛市內公交車(chē)駛過(guò),車(chē)內所有的燈都關(guān)著(zhù)。我可以看到里面人影綽綽,而這上的指示牌寫(xiě)著(zhù):“哪兒也不去?!敝钡浇裉?,我都不知道那是怎么回事。

DarkViolet
I've actually been on a bus where the driver didn't know her route.

我以前坐過(guò)的一輛公交車(chē),是位女司機,而且他還不知道路線(xiàn)。
#23 (無(wú)…無(wú)人機)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(不知那個(gè)混蛋賣(mài)給我奶奶的“無(wú)人機”)

Abel
I am actually siting on one of these drones.

我現在就在其中一架無(wú)人機上坐著(zhù)。

Lia is a platypus
What do you mean? That is definitely a drone??

你以為是啥?那絕對是一架無(wú)人機?
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Klopec
That's hilarious!

笑慘

Lightning_Thief
Anything can be a drone if you throw it at someone's face

任何東西都可以是無(wú)人機,只要你把它扔飛到別人臉上
#24 (作弊)


Burnt Bagel
Hasn’t his hair grown out by now?!

這人的頭發(fā)是還沒(méi)長(cháng)全嗎!

Bella Davinci
I saw butt.

我看怎么像是屁股形狀

Jared Robinson
lol I consider this bullying.

我認為這是在侮辱人

Ronnie Cutshall
The answer is four by Republican math or 6 for Democrats.

要是共和黨人的答案就是4,民主黨人的就是是6。

Bananaramamama (edited)
In what way is this relative to politics?

這跟政治有啥關(guān)系?
#25 (對話(huà)AI)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

我:這里是那?
AI:對不起,我無(wú)法取得您的定位
我:你騙我
AI:我沒(méi)騙人,我真的無(wú)法定位你的位置
我:那離我最近一家漢堡店在哪?
AI:確實(shí),離你不遠是有家漢堡店,這家漢堡店就在本市青年大街道邊(托納旺達市楊街街邊)。

Olivia Lisbon
I think I’m missing something, but then I don’t use Snapchat. Does it by definition have access to your location or something?

雖然我不用Snapchat,但感覺(jué)好像漏掉了什么。你給她賦權位置定位了嗎?

Jake stenhouse
How did you know it was Snapchat?

你怎么知道他用的是Snapchat?

IDidntChooseReality
I asked it to draw me a circle and it said "no I can't but I can send you a pic of one" so I was like ok send a pic and it said "sorry I can't send pictures"

我讓它給我畫(huà)一個(gè)圓圈,它說(shuō)"不行,我不能,但我可以給你發(fā)一張照片"。我說(shuō)好吧,發(fā)一張照片,它又說(shuō)"抱歉,我不能發(fā)照片"

Cara
Maybe McDonald’s told ‘My AI’ where he is!

也許是麥當勞把他的位置告訴了“MY AI”!

Timbob
What is this ?

這啥撒玩意
#26 (奶奶的愛(ài))

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(有次我跟奶奶說(shuō)做個(gè)三明治在坐火車(chē)時(shí)吃的,于是奶奶給我做了這個(gè))

IguanaStampede
That's what grandmas do.

奶奶那都是這樣

Forgot My Name...
Bet you could make a lot of friends on the train with that.

我打賭你在火車(chē)上一定能交到很多朋友。

Timbob
She must own a sandwich shop. That looks like professional Clear Wrap !

你奶奶肯定開(kāi)了一家三明治店。這個(gè)三明治看起來(lái)做得很地道!

Nice Beast Ludo
So sweet. Now you can feed the whole train!! She wants you to have friends...or if she's like my Aunt Betty be irate that I didn't eat it all myself

好暖心。感覺(jué)這三明治都能夠火車(chē)上的人全吃飽了!!她希望你能交到朋友…或許他可能會(huì )跟我的貝蒂阿姨一樣,因為我沒(méi)有自己吃完而不高興。

emma malcolm
i would have no shame devouring that whole thing

我就是把整個(gè)都吞了也不會(huì )有啥不好意思的

Chelsea Morgan
I really thought this was rolled up marijuana and I was like grandma is really wild!

我還以為這是卷曲來(lái)的大號大麻煙,我就覺(jué)得奶奶做的三明治太簡(jiǎn)單粗暴了!

Isaac Harvey
Is this supposed to be a bad thing?

這難道不是在好事么?

Dana Ondrá?ková 51 minutes ago
You havent said how long of a ride it is so she wanted to be sure you wont starve to death

你沒(méi)說(shuō)要在車(chē)上呆多長(cháng)時(shí)間,所以她怕你餓死
#27(真假喬丹)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(圖:左真右假)

Lemme get the lemons
ITS BEEN SO LONG!

好久沒(méi)見(jiàn)了

Derpy, Octavia, Vinyl
It might be fake

不算太假
#28 (廣告?)
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(糗死了,有人跟我說(shuō),我帽子上的圖案看起來(lái)像是谷歌主頁(yè))

Capybara with a cat
But it's true

確實(shí)

unseeable mouse
Very much

沒(méi)錯

Timbob
That’s OK ! As long as it doesn’t say “MAGa” !

沒(méi)事兒!只要別寫(xiě)" MAGa "就行!

mimi luvs cats
they actually aren't wrong

說(shuō)的確實(shí)沒(méi)錯
#29 (隱形車(chē))
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Funny-No-Context-Idiots

(出售:雷諾Clio隱形款,車(chē)況很好,但有個(gè)小缺陷,前保險杠沒(méi)法隱形)
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Kerry Miller
Front bumper looks fine to me. What's the bhp?

我看前保險杠沒(méi)什么問(wèn)題。這車(chē)馬力多少?

Cardboard Box (He/She)
That might work for wonder woman

這車(chē)應該會(huì )很適合神奇女俠用

ckcl
Car for sale. Car parts not included.

車(chē)可以賣(mài)、但零件不算在內。

Valek Fermiga
How much do you want for it....??

你想要賣(mài)多錢(qián)....??
#30(誠不欺我)

Funny-No-Context-Idiots

USMCFelicia
I'm more curious about this flamboyant shopping center lol

讓我更好奇的是地圖里顯示的“豪華購物中心”
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.top-shui.cn 轉載請注明出處


Sergio Bicerra
During winter, cars sleep together to keep each other warm

冬季到了天冷了,小汽車(chē)擁抱在一起相互取暖