How to Give a Spanking
1Disciplining Nonviolently
2Preparing to Spank
3Delivering the Spanking

1.律人非暴力
2.準備打屁股
3.實(shí)施打屁股


Spanking is a much-debated topic. Most child psychologists do not recommend spanking as a discipline method for children. However, some parents will tell you that a spanking given with fairness, love, and care is an effective discipline technique. The decision as to the usefulness of spanking is best made by a child's parents, within the norms and laws of their local regions.

打屁股這個(gè)話(huà)題備受爭議。大部分兒童心理學(xué)家不建議將打屁股作為管教孩子的方法。然而有些家長(cháng)會(huì )告訴你 ,用公平合理、愛(ài)護和關(guān)懷的方式打屁股是一種管用的管教技巧。至于打屁股到底有沒(méi)有用,孩子的父母最好是遵守當地的法律法規再做出決定。

1.
Disciplining Nonviolently

非暴力管教(律人)

Start small.

從小教起
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Don't immediately spank your child if you see them doing something you dislike. Talk to them first, and try a nonviolent method of discipline if needed. If you decide to spank a child, it should only be as a last resort, after other methods have failed.

如果你看到你的孩子在做你不喜歡的事情,不要馬上打他的屁股。先和他們談?wù)?,如果需要的?huà),嘗試一種非暴力的方式管教。如果你決定打孩子的屁股,這應該是最后的手段,在其他方法失敗后。

Conditional spanking (a mild spanking after a 2-to-6-year-old child has defied a less extreme form of discipline) is less risky than spanking as a first resort, according to some studies.[1]

據研究,特定條件下打屁股(當一個(gè)2到6歲的孩子違抗了不太極端的管教方式后,溫和地打兩下屁股)比作為第一手段的打屁股風(fēng)險要小。[1]
[1]:另有研究表明體罰——包括打屁股、毆打和其他引起疼痛的手段——會(huì )增加兒童的攻擊性、反社會(huì )行為、身體傷害和心理健康問(wèn)題

2.
Ask the child calmly why they did what they did.

心平氣和地問(wèn)孩子他們?yōu)槭裁催@么做

The child may not have realized that what they did was wrong, or maybe you misunderstood what happened. Talking can help clarify the situation: either helping the child realize why their decision was a bad one or helping you realize that your child didn't misbehave after all.

孩子們可能沒(méi)有意識到自己做錯事情,要么是你對發(fā)生的事情誤會(huì )了。談話(huà)能幫助你搞明白情況:要么幫孩子認識到他們的行為是錯的,要么幫你認識到你的孩子壓根沒(méi)有不當行為。

If you're too upset to be calm, say "I'm so upset, I need a break to calm down." Walk out of the room and take some deep breaths. Then come back.

如果你因心煩意亂無(wú)法平靜心情,你可以對自己說(shuō)句:“我太難了,我需要休息一下,冷靜一下?!弊叱龊⒆臃块g,做個(gè)深呼吸,然后再回來(lái)。

3.
Talk to the child about the consequences of their actions.
For example:
"How do you think your sister will feel about you breaking her toy"
"When I didn't see you in the store, I felt really scared. I need you to stay close by so I know you're safe and not lost."
"How do you think Dad felt when he had to clean poop out of the bathtub"

與孩子談?wù)撍麄兊男袨闀?huì )造成的后果。
比如:

"How do you think your sister will feel about you breaking her toy"

“你覺(jué)得你妹妹會(huì )怎么想你弄壞她的玩具?”

"When I didn't see you in the store, I felt really scared. I need you to stay close by so I know you're safe and not lost."

“當我在商場(chǎng)看不到你的時(shí)候,我會(huì )感覺(jué)非常擔心。我要你呆在我身旁,這樣我才知道你沒(méi)有走丟、沒(méi)有迷路?!?/b>

"How do you think Dad felt when he had to clean poop out of the bathtub"

“你覺(jué)得你爸爸會(huì )怎么想他老是要從浴缸清理糞便?”

4.
Consider whether the child needs to be punished at all.

想清楚孩子是不是真的需要懲罰。

5.
Look at non-physical consequences if needed.

如果懲罰有需要,考慮一下非身體性處罰

6.
Give yourself a time out if you get angry with your child.

如果你生陔子的氣,請給自己點(diǎn)時(shí)間喘息

Parenting is hard, and it's normal to get frustrated or mad sometimes. If you feel like you're going to explode, step out of the room to calm down. You can discipline your child once you are level-headed.

為人父母難,偶爾感到沮喪、生氣是很正常的。如果你覺(jué)得自己快要爆炸了,就走出房間冷靜一下吧。等到你心態(tài)平和了,你就可以管教你的孩子了。

Tell your child, "I am so mad, I don't know what to do! I am going to take a break to deal with my emotions."

告訴你的娃,“我好生氣,我不知道怎么辦,我要休息一下,平復心情?!?/b>

7.
Help a child who is struggling to do what you ask.

幫一把那個(gè)正在堅難實(shí)現你期望的那個(gè)孩子
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If your child struggles with cleaning their room, it might help if you do it with them.

如果你的孩大在打掃房間方面有堅難,你和他們一起打掃可能會(huì )有用。

8.
Talk to a child about how to behave better next time.
Sometimes, kids misbehave because they just don't know better.

和孩子談?wù)勗趺幢憩F得更好
有時(shí)候,孩子們不守規矩是因為他們不懂規矩

9.Praise the child for good behavior.

表?yè)P孩子的檢點(diǎn)行為

10.
Be a good role model.

以身作則